Fear is a natural mechanism , primarly used to activate the human being to protect himself from danger and improve the possibilities for survival. The frightening stimulus makes the brain process the facts and combined with the data that has been stored withing the years of experince makes the person decide to run or hide.
The usual fears of children are darkness, separation from parents ( or animals), being rejected by peers or even natural disasters. It is allright for children to be a bit worried about these things, but we must make sure they don’t exaggerate.
When should we worry?
-When there is no actually real danger
-When this fear leads to extreme anxiety
-When the child’s routine changes; eg he doesn’t want to go to school etc.
How can we help?
1 . Our reaction is very important. The children look up to us to be inspired. Our optimism and confidence helps them realise that maybe things are not as serious as the seem
2.We must recognise their feelings. The child does feel afraid. The reality of the certain obect of fear is a relative thing. With our guidance we can help get over it.We can explain meanings like anxiety and fear in our everyday life; make a story about them;or even invite the child to draw about it
3.Our thought is the most important key to the solution. Thoughts may make us be afraid, but they can also make us forget about our fear by concentrating in other things.
4.We can also suggest our children to stop and observe a)how possible is what are afraid to happen and b) to have a plan about what can be done if their fear comes real. It would be nice to say “what would your favorite hero do in such a case?”or c)find things that makes him relax in every day life
5.Remember to reward them if the make a step towards their fear, however small it may be
6.In the end,if everything fails and cannot get over it through the years, we could ask for help from a specialist
What do you think?What are your children’s fear?What do you do to help them? Share your stories!